Look for Ways to Help Others
I once worked in a downtown office. Homeless people would sometimes interrupt my short trek from my car to the building to ask for money.
Not wanting to get involved, I’d shake my head and say, “I don’t have any money on me.” Sometimes this was true. Other times, I felt guilty for lying.
I wanted to do better.
Later, I went to an urban church that attracted a lot of homeless and financially marginalized people. They, too, had needs, which they were more than happy to share with me.
Because of these experiences, I determined to strive to help others who were truly in need, while working even harder to ensure I didn’t enable them in their less-than-ideal situations or be taken advantage of.
To achieve this goal, I’d seek to verify their actual need. This required talking to them. It meant listening with discernment. It meant unraveling their web of deceit to find out its root cause.
Many times, they’d grow weary of my probing and give up. They’d make an awkward retreat and leave me so they could go find an easier mark.
Other times I’d end up putting myself in an unwise situation—or at least it seemed that way in hindsight. Yet God protected me in my naiveté. Though I’d never give them money, I would buy them things.
It might be a burger at a quick-serve restaurant or a bag of groceries. I might purchase a bus pass for them or put gas in their car.
Once I even offered to cover a motel room for one night. But when the guy was a no-show, I realized he didn’t want a place to sleep as much as the money the room represented.
Despite my careful efforts, in retrospect, I think they conned me more often than not.
Through these experiences, I realized the surefire way to make sure no one ever took advantage of my generosity. It’s quite simple. Never give, and they’ll never take advantage of you.
Given this sobering truth, I persist in being open to help people address their genuine needs, while being a discerning steward of money.
I don’t have as many opportunities to exercise this anymore, as I now live in a rural area with no visible homelessness and little poverty.
In considering the situation on a larger scale—regional, national, and international—pressing needs continue to confront me.
To manage expectations with a clear conscience, I determined areas I would consider. The rest could receive a quick guilt-free decline.
For me, these areas are clean water, microfinance, Bibles, native missionaries, and local organizations I’m personally involved with. I give serious consideration to needs in these areas. Otherwise, the request receives an easy no.
Sometimes my contributions are not monetary. Instead, I give my time or my possessions.
As I’m open to helping people in need and supporting areas I’m passionate about, it’s not merely about giving money, time, or resources. It’s also the satisfaction of knowing that in my small way I’ve made the world a bit better.
This is what happens when we freely give.
Life Lesson
We need to help others as often as we can.
Read more in Peter Lyle DeHaan’s latest book Sticky Living featuring his compelling story-driven insights and tips, part of the Sticky Series.
Peter Lyle DeHaan is an entrepreneur and businessman who has managed, owned, and started multiple businesses over his career. Common themes at every turn have included customer service, sales and marketing, and leadership and management.
He shares his lifetime of business experience and personal insights through his books to encourage, inspire, and occasionally entertain.